So school is going to be a little much this semester. 4 nights a week with two out of three courses being 4 credit, might send me over the edge but I'm determined to get through it without going (completely) crazy.
I've been thinking about my weight a lot lately. (what woman doesn't?) Since getting married I've been amazed not only at how out of shape I've gotten but how much I don't care. Ross would still see me as the size 4 I was when we started dating even if I gained 50 pounds - which is amazing, bring on the oreos and fries, BUT I've seen a huge change in the way I think and how I feel - about life and about myself. I ran a half marathon right before Ross and I started dating and I, seriously, thought I could do anything. I could go out and run 10 miles without thinking twice about it. I walk up a flight of stairs now and I'm winded. Not only am I winded but I'm sad that I'm winded. And to be honest, I'm kinda sick of feeling sad about it. I'm determined to feel better about myself and about my life. I've lost a HUGE amount of self confidence in my ability to finish a task or to be able to
tackle a task. That + being newly married + full time work & full time school = a very stressed out human being. I miss my I CAN DO IT ALL attitude and I'm determined to get that back.
In life there are problems, solutions and the plans to the solutions.
My Problem: The scale keeps 'a' creepin'.
My Solution: I'm going to make this blog a form of my accountability. Yea I know, I have, maybe, 3 readers who are in fact all family members but it's a start. Once I start feeling better maybe I'll sign up for a little race.
My Plan: Seeing that I sleep in (everyday) I'm going to be waking up early every morning to either run on the treadmill (slow at first) or do some strength building with either some pilates or Jillian Michaels 30 day shred. To be honest I'm a little scared about this. I don't mean the whole plan - I mean of Jillian.
As of right now I weigh (sadly) about 23 pounds more than I want to. I've never been at the weight that I'm at and I seriously don't want to be afraid of a scale anymore.
This is to clarify (for the record) : This is so that I can feel better about myself and try to think more positively. I actually don't have a problem with the way that I look. It's that I can really FEEL that extra weight. Mentally, emotionally, and physically.
Wish me luck.
My goal:
P.s. If you read this.... I miss you Cori.
Here I goo......
: )
Cathy